Sharing invites others to judge us,
though they may deny it with even their dying breath.
Verbally, or silently, consciously or subconsciously
all of us judge everyone all the time.
That doesn’t make us bad people.
Our brains are designed to do that,
and it is a survival mechanism that has served us well
over the countless millennia.
Come let us shake hands with the brain stem.
When faced with any thing, being or phenomena
our reptilian brain {or “Id”} asks five self-centered questions:
#1 Should I feed on it?
#2 Should I f$%k it?
#3 Should I fight it?
#4 Should I flee from it?
#5 Should I faint before it?
In other words, a very old part of our brain is always asking:
“Is this Good for me?” or,
“Is this Bad for me?”
Our brain asks this about:
• every thing,
• every circumstance,
• every social construct,
• every relationship and
• every person.
The more open we are with a partner,
the greater the chance that they could judge us {even subconsciously}
and what they feel for us could change.
They might love us more,
or they could even love us less.
So obviously, the prospect of no longer being loved
by one that we adore is profoundly painful.
But is it necessarily a bad thing?
We need to be with someone who really gets us,
who sees us clearly
and not only likes what they see
but also:
• loves,
• respects,
• cherishes,
• adores and is
• profoundly grateful for it.
Every time we’re open
we run the risk of someone
no longer loving, or even liking us.
Painful?
Yeah, sure you-bet’cha!
But is it necessarily a bad thing?
Not, so much.
We NEED to be loved, cherished, respected and adored
for who we really are.
Why could it be better to be alone then
to be with someone who can NOT love us,
the way we need to be loved,
for who we truly are?
These are the questions that test our courage,
and that plum the depth of our vulnerability.
Hey, needing to be loved does not make us weak.
We are wired to need:
#1 to love another and
#2 to be loved in return.
This instinct that drives us to successfully pair-bond is, arguably,
one of the reasons that this small, slow, weak race of creatures
without any claws or fangs
has managed to survive so well.
Is there a risk to being open?
There is.
But it pails before the danger of habitually
indulging the fear that can transform us into
closed-off little cowards that hind behind the cleverly crafted facades
of who we really aren’t.
Come let us become the spiritual superheroes that
we were born to be.
You could register today .
May you and yours be
happy and healthy!
Om Mani Padme Hum,
NON-sectarian Buddhist: Monk, Teacher, Healer and Tantrika
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